like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
