Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
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