I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize