I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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