problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I will die if light touches me.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
