I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
