youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Randomize
