Will you blow on my dice?
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
