I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Randomize