My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
there was a trapeze. enough said
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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