Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
