She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
