just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
