i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
