Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Randomize
