I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
