Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
