i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize