i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
