I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
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