He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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