nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
