we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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