I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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