McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize
