You really coming over, don't trick.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize