I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Randomize
