tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
