Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
I don't deserve a penis
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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