You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize
