I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
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