I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Randomize