i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
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