Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
