She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Randomize
