I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Randomize