No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize