There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Randomize
