Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize