You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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