i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
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