This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize
