We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I'm too high and old for this...
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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