Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
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