I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
God I need to hump something, right now.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
