Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
I understand Curling. That high.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Randomize
