The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
