i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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