they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize
