So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Randomize
